The Sanchez Vine Video: Butt Fumble Part Two

As you may have heard, Sanchez is now a viral sensation for something that's not a butt fumble.

For those want the Sparknotes version, he and two models are dancing and having a good time in a house. At one point, Sanchez pants are down around his hamstrings, exposing his buttocks. Other than that, there's a lot of "dancing"/jumping around, a few cleavage shots (I wasn't looking), wine and glassware, and an e-cigarette (which Sanchez appears to smoke). For those who haven't seen it: here's a link to the video.

Let's be honest here. If we were young, 25, and single with millions to spend, wouldn't you hang out with models? When one takes a video do you tell her no? So it's not a big story really, except it's Sanchez and the Jets. He had a fun time, someone took a video and shared it, but for the media it's been a gold mine. Let's be honest, only three types of people would consider this as a big story:

The people who personally dislike Sanchez. (Hating him for sucking on the field is one thing, hating him for being Mark Sanchez the human is another.)

The logic goes something like this. He should be film studying, calling coaches, reading the playbook 24/7! Reality is this sometimes you need a break from football/school/whatever. For my money, hanging with models is a good way to relax. Let the guy live, but if you're Rex you make sure he knows his stuff when he gets back. It's not a big deal unless he looks clueless in the huddle, but that wouldn't be much different than any other time, AMIRITE?

The other people who care are the ESPN/Daily News types who love to write the Jets are a Circus™ articles. A QB having fun and getting caught on video? Blasphemy! Must mean he won't be ready for the season! This is what happens when Rex is in charge! Blah, Blah, Blah.

They love it, just because they now have "proof". The media's philosophy is write an article with no analysis (The Jets don't play hard, Jets are a circus™) and wait for the news like this. It's basically Christmas for them. Now they can write a week's worth of crap without ever having to do research or analysis because the evidence can be twisted into whatever story line they want to sell.

The last is the former teammates looking for a quick spike in popularity. It's a cheap way for them to get in the paper and name out there. Eric Ainge is one of them.

For those that don't know or remember Eric Ainge, he's most famous for his 4 game drug suspension and appearing on Jackass 3D. He's also somewhat known for his candidness about his drug addiction problem and fight to overcome it. (Wish him all the best staying clean.) That's about it, he never saw the field ever, was on injured reserve an entire year, and basically was a 5th round flyer that never panned out. I don't blame you if you never heard of him.

But he has a radio show, and because he's a former Jet, that makes him knowledgeable on Sanchez. This is what he had to say:

“Now it’s become a thing to try and catch Mark doing something stupid,” Ainge said. “He’s never breaking the law. Look at Aaron Hernandez — Mark Sanchez is child’s play in the NFL, as far as off-the-field stuff. I’d know as good as anybody — what Mark does off the field is child’s play.
"He’s dumb about it. He’s stupid while being stupid. You have to be smart while being stupid, and he’s dumb while being dumb. Look at the butt video. He needs someone he trusts there when Mark wants to go streaking through his own condo.”

So he's stupid while being stupid? What that means, I don't even know. What's stupid while being smart? Reading a book on quantum mechanics while getting caught on video with naked models? Studying 13th century text while you take shots at a bar? Anyone?

Look we all know Sanchez isn't the most confident out there on the field, but now according to Ainge, it's his personal life too in question. He's having fun, taking a video with models, partially taking off his pants, and somehow this makes him scared?

Haven't we all had that one time when we just had fun in front of the other sex? And doesn't it take some guff to go bare-butt in front of them, especially if they are good looking? But for the Jets are a Circus™ crowd and former players, it's a chance to talk and bash the Jets and Sanchez. Especially if it means you can get the terms butt into an article. Because then you can use butt-fumble too.

Understand something, I'm not defending Sanchez. I'm not saying he should be fine with videos being posted like this. What I am saying it's not a big deal, even though the media would have blown it up in any other week. Luckily for Sanchez, other news up to our north is dominating the headlines. As someone said the other day, Sanchez got lucky, if it was any other week, Sportscenter would have full coverage of the video, send someone to ask Rex if his tatoo can move like that, and I'm guessing that Herm the Worm would be in the studio critiquing his dance moves.

At this point, I'm sick of hearing about Sanchez's home life. Sick of hearing the words butt fumble. Sick of hearing the Jets are a Circus™garbage. Just let me see some football. But this is June, where not much happens and the media needs to come up with a story, so here it is.

I'll leave you with this quote from Tully Corcoran of Foxsports:

But after the famous Butt Fumble and now this, Mark Sanchez and butts might just need to go 

their separate ways.

HA.

HA.

HA.

Good Grief. Another butt fumble joke. Wake me up when the season starts.